Folks, Gay Charles will not be upstaged by further nobodies.
In other words, Gay didn’t like someone else getting the attention, so he is working his posterior off to get back here in a most expeditious manner.
He will be back soon. Thank you for your patience in this matter.
I am shamed to admit that I have no idea what that thing is in your header. Clearly that is not a reflection on you, Gay, but on me, and my complete and utter foolishness. I’m simply not witty enough to cut my way through your intricate metaphors. So I’m sure that your header–which to me looks all the world like a contestant from Klansman Idol–holds some deeper meaning which I am just too simple-minded to discern.
Okay — I didn’t get the F***IN’ memo. So who am I supposed to F***IN’ worship this week??? I know that Gay briefly got his F***IN’ bowels in an uproar (and rightly so!) over the F***IN’ fawning attention that was being garnered by the F***IN’ trusted sidekick — and if this means that F***IN’ Gay is F***IN’ returing and that the F***IN’ sidekick has been F***IN’ ’sidelined’ then I couldn’t be F***IN’ happier than a piglet in a F***IN’ mud puddle.
The thing is… unless I am F***IN’ told, I do not know where to place my F***IN’ trust and focus. Which is why F***IN’ GAY is so missed. So please kick that F***IN’ virtual GPS into F***IN’ gear and F***IN’ direct us, F***IN’ Gay. Otherwise, we don’t know what we will F***IN’ do with our F***IN’ selves!!!!!
GCFC – What the F****IN’ is the matter with you?!#
When all is F***IN’ said and done, there will still be F***IN’ lots of Gay to still love and fawn over. Don’t get your panties in a F***IN’ uproar!!! You know how Gay likes all the attention!!! Get your F***IN’ head on F***IN’ straight and maybe he will F***IN’s come back to all his F***IN’ fans.
Sorry if you don’t “get” this F***IN’ insiders F***IN’ joke, but that’s your F***IN’ loss.
Hi Gay man where ever you are!! We still F***IN’ love you and worship the F***IN ground you walk on guy!
Okay now Gay and/or Tainted Smudge (or whatever your sidekick’s name is)— the ugly rumors have started and the word on the street is that you are packing your bags for good and playing “Happy Trails” as you saunter off into the sunset. I feel like I am a dangling participle with no grammatical connection left. For you, Gay, have been our ONLY connection to the Soulful Sex Bomb – and with EVERYTHING now being taken away from us as if we were horrid little children eating between meals, there is no joy in Mudville. It doesn’t matter that the Dynamic Dirty Dancer now speaks to us directly and bypasses our favorite, testosterone-challenged guru — he is simply the puppet to the puppetmaster, and that is YOU, Gay!!!
If you leave us, where do we go to worship you? I bought TONS of incense and candles which have been carefully placed around hard copies of your missives. True, I can barely see my computer screen to type now as I burn the ceremonial essences which I pray will find their way to you – but the visual sacrifice and lung damage is worth it if in some way, shape, or form you will return to us.
Please lead us… Direct us… Give us a purpose for existing. As I face the black cavern of my life, knowing that this may be the beginning of the end, I pray you’ll make your way back to us.
Remember: Gray is just a color – but GAY is FOREVER!
Dude, I hope you do get back here soon! I haven’t had a good ass whuppin’ in so long, I’m actually able to sit down, and it’s really freaking me out!!!
I’ve heard rumors about other blogs that are abandoned without warning or reasonable explanation, and I am sure the rest of my Gay family has heard of the same sort of things happening elsewhere.
I am but a simple minion, wholly devoted to lifting up the massive ego of our Dastardly Darling, while never allowing my lips to leave his ass for one nanosecond. However, I am a minion, who keeps her ear to the ground, her eye on the prize, and her nose near the hose! And I can tell you, that Gay would never leave us homeless and lost in a cyber world of strangers, looking for love in all the wrong places.
If Gay says he will return as soon as possible, I have faith that he will, because he loves us that much. And, let’s face it, he craves our love and devotion, like a vampire craves Type O negative!
Oh my little Piquant Peach, promise me you will never leave us! I have been lost like a strawberry without shortcake, an apple without a dumpling, a banana without a split…
Without you, how will we ever know what’s is happening from moment to moment with our Musical Mango Man? How will I live without 30 second video clips showing incomplete conversations, that prove just how significant YOUR relationship with him is?
Come home to us, my sweet. I’m on my knees begging you. And you know just what I might be able to do for you while I’m down here!
Oh, my sweet, darling Gay. I had a terrible dream last night. I dreamt that we were ill-behaved. I dreamt that we were urchins. And I dreamt that as punishment, you completely yanked the site, e-flogging not only those of us who were naughty, but those who cared only to peruse your archives and soak in your wit without leaving their kudos, or without debating the merits of Tasty Nuggets vs. Thighlicious Marshmallow Cruch. Of course, those people deserve to be punished as well, since you have no use for those who do not kiss your feet daily…but I digress. And I dreamt that in place of your glorious blog, you left an obnoxious quote addressed “to the tiny people.” I thought you were being insulting, drama-queenish, huffy. But then you set me straight by telling me that I was only insulted because I wasn’t intelligent enough to realize that, as per is par for the course with your majesty, your insults and barbs could easily be explained away in flash. “It’s meta,” you grumbled at me. “Assholes.”
And then I woke up.
Gay, where are you? I’m lost without you!
What can we do to make you come back to us?
I can find Gay here and there,
I can find Gay EVERYWHERE!
Posting on a thread or log,
In the sun and in the fog!
Gay will never go away,
Gay is frankly here to stay!
After all, what would Gay do,
With old-Gay wife and things One and Two?
The love Gay gets here far surpasses,
What he gets from ‘home kissed asses.’
So look around cause Gay’s not far,
In Gay-type thread or Gay-type bar.
Because wherever we-go, HE-go,
(someone has to feed that EGO!)
Dayum,
This is some funny sh!t! I don’t know who you all are but you get it.
THE OFFICIAL GAY CHARLES SCORE CARD:
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
Oh GREAT!!! You’re BACK!!!
(oh wait — you’re not….)
What are you insinuating, peasant? Well, yes, you do know the score…
Oh Gay!!! You ARE back!!! Praise the guilded onion!!!!!!!!!!!
Please allow us to exchange some much needed and overdue “peasantries” since it seems the last time we heard from you, Moses had just parted the Red Sea!!!
Where have you been? What have you been doing? (besides posing for photo-op’s with what I can only determine must be one of your offspring — so how many “D” batteries does it take to keep that furry little guy clanging his cymbals????)
We anxiously await your snarky F-bombs!!!!!