Hello, folks. This is Gay’s friend, Shade of Gay. I just wanted to introduce myself to you good people. I’m Gay’s BFFN (best friend for now). Gay is working with our Handsome Honcho to finalize the newest breakfast food on the market, but for now, I can accept your humble praise.
Gay Charles
Thanks for the mammaries
Greetings and salutations, SOGGY! And welcome to our Gay family!
You don’t mind if I call you Soggy, do you? I think it’s appropriate, since our beloved Gay is off on a cereal mission.
I’ll try not to pour milk on you and make you even soggier than you already are!! Just kidding! I am sure that any friend of Gay’s has the backbone and fortitude to avoid becoming soggy in milk.
Welcome, Shade of Gay! I expect to find out in the coming weeks that you’ve been Gay’s BFF (even though, strangely, he’s never mentioned you before). I also expect that you’ll author posts in which you shamelessly, blatantly, and rather poorly attempt to mimic Gay’s superior wit, style, and aplomb. And please tell me you’ll display a deplorable lack of basic grammar and punctuation skills. Meanwhile, I’m sure Gay is relaxing on some tropical island somewhere, enjoying fruity mixed drinks (with little paper umbrellas) brought to him by unpaid interns, to whom he bitches and moans about the hardship he’s suffered running this place.
Welcome aboard.
Thanks, friends.
Yes, I’m holding back some of my wit, only to make my BFFN look wittier. It was one of the requirements of this position (the position as his BFFN, that is).
No, Gay hasn’t mentioned my name before, but you may already know me. Perchance. Or perchance not, as the saying goes.
Yeeeeah…. that’s my kinda header…. heh heh… ‘head’er